Sponsored by the Aroostook Substance Abuse Prevention Collaborative
With the holidays behind us and the possibilities of a new year ahead, many of us are reevaluating our lives, making resolutions and striving toward our new found goals with determination. Typical New Years Resolutions include weight loss, getting into shape, getting organized, sticking to a budget, and/or quitting smoking. Although all of these are important I would like to suggest an equally important, fulfilling resolution that will impact you in a healthy and profound way. I would like to propose that at the top of you 2010 New Year’s Resolution list you write … spend more time at home as a family. Why does time at home matter to you or your child? It matters because work, school, activities, and other obligations seem to be pulling family members apart rather than bringing them together. As a result each family member begins to travel down a different road becoming more and more isolated. Conversation decreases, tension rises and a disconnect forms between siblings, parents etc. This disconnect affects everyone in the home.
According to a University of Maryland study, parents today spend only 17 hours per week with their children, 40 percent fewer than in 1965. Parents are feeling that due to schedules etc. They do not get to spend nearly as much quality time with their children as they would like.
When the Family and Work Institute surveyed 3,381 adults nationwide, they found that 66 percent wanted more time with their children. Youth feel very much the same way. In a Search Institute study, almost 20 percent of 6–12th graders said they had not had a good conversation, lasting more than 10 minutes, with either one of their parents in more than a month. Believe it or not youth want conversation, family time and time at home.
We can not quit our jobs, quit school, give up activities we love or back out of all our obligations just so we can accomplish our goal of spending more Time At Home, Asset 20 of Search Institute’s 40 Developmental Assets.
The qualities, experiences, and relationships that help young people grow up healthy, caring and responsible, help to put the spark back in young people’s lives. What we can do is ask ourselves a few basic questions such as how can we better balance our individual commitments and family time, how we can make home time more appealing, and how we can steer our family in the same direction rather than opposite directions? From there set realistic goals such as spending at least one evening together a week, eat at least one meal together every day, and turn off the TV during family time. Spending time at the table is an old idea but a powerful one.
A great way for families to spend time together is to gather around the table for a meal. Some of my families most important decisions, heartfelt conversations and meaningful memories have been made over our spaghetti bowls.
So as the winter blahs are upon us take a moment this week to invite those you love most to a meal, snowball fight, game night, or whatever else might help to reconnect the ties that bind your family together. Families, if they are loving, supportive, and nurturing, are something we all need to be healthy, happy individuals. What better resolution to make than to reconnect with those we love most.
This article was brought to you by Aroostook Substance Abuse Prevention. For more information about ASAP and 40 Developmental Assets contact Allison Heidorn, Developmental Asset coordinator at 540-6772 or visit www.asapcoalition.com
