PRESQUE ISLE, Maine — Growing up as the oldest child in a family of 10 children, Lois Shaw of Presque Isle remembers having to fight to be alone, and enjoy peace and quiet away from the usual chaos of life.
“If you wanted to say something, you had to shout ‘My turn!'” Shaw said, laughing as she recalled her childhood days in central Aroostook County.
But today, in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, Shaw prefers to not be alone as much as possible. She anxiously awaits the phone calls, Facebook chats and socially distanced visits from friends, including Sharon O’Brien, also of Presque Isle.
Shaw and O’Brien were acquaintances during many of the years that O’Brien served as an administrative secretary for SAD 1. They have become even closer friends in recent years while volunteering for local agencies such as Aroostook Agency on Aging, United Way of Aroostook and food pantries, and attending church and Bible studies together.
O’Brien is one of 32 people who serve as Friendly Volunteers for the Aroostook Agency on Aging. She is known as a Friendly Visitor, someone who takes time for visits and phone calls and helps older folks access important community services and activities.
“Volunteering keeps me young and active,” O’Brien said. “We have to have people looking out for each other, even more so now.”
Although both O’Brien and Shaw are old enough to remember the devastating financial and personal losses caused by the Great Depression and World War II, even they were not prepared for the increased isolation that has become a norm during the COVID-19 pandemic.
“I tell people that I have three friends at home: the TV, computer and telephone,” Shaw said, when discussing how she connects with friends and loved ones most of the time.
Shaw has three children who live near Portland, and another who lives in Georgia. This year will mark the first Christmas she’ll spend alone, after deciding not to travel downstate where COVID-19 case numbers are higher.
With the holiday just around the corner, Shaw was excited to enjoy a recent socially distanced visit with O’Brien at the Agency on Aging’s main office. She talked about how she had to rely on her friend even more after suffering minor injuries in a vehicle crash in September.
“My car was totaled and I was lucky to walk away from it all. I just needed help with transportation,” Shaw said. “It’s hard sometimes to ask for help, but I’m lucky to have friends who said, ‘If you need anything, let me know.'”
Helping senior citizens gain friendships, bond with their neighbors and reduce social isolation, as Shaw and O’Brien have, is the motivation behind the Agency on Aging’s role in the national Home for the Holidays campaign.
While 43 County residents are currently benefiting from the Friendly Volunteers program, the Agency is extending that service to include Friendly Callers who make telephone calls to isolated individuals, Friendly Helpers who take care of yard work and other household tasks, as well as Friendly Neighbors and Friendly Technology Helpers.
Friendly Neighbors are people who check in on older neighbors to ensure they are remaining safe and healthy.
Sherry Beaulieu, Agency on Aging manager of volunteer services, said that speaking with older residents who benefit from Friendly Volunteers has made her realize just how widespread social isolation is for seniors in Aroostook County. Even prior to the pandemic, people who were without transportation or living alone often faced depression, anxiety about their health and well-being and severe loneliness.
“We’ve had seniors call us to ask if someone could call them every day just to check on them. They were afraid that they’d get hurt or sick or pass away without anyone knowing,” Beaulieu said.
Though the pandemic has brought about the need for social distancing, Beaulieu is encouraging people to become Friendly Volunteers and lift the spirits of older people who are in greater need of social and emotional connections. She views O’Brien as a great example of someone who continually reaches out to others out of the kindness of her heart.
“She does so much [for Shaw] just by calling her and letting her know that she can depend on her,” Beaulieu said.
More than anything, Shaw said, O’Brien’s companionship helps keep her feeling young and looking forward to the days ahead.
“Age is just a state of mind. I’ve known people who were old at 21 and young at 90,” Shaw said.
