September marks the beginning of fly season in the County. They are called house flies and have been hiding somewhere in the environment. A chill develops, followed by some warming, and the Great Fly event begins.
Every person who grew up in the County remembers those colorful fly swatters, some stiff wire and a plastic square. Used with abandon, the device splattered many flies and knocked over many lamps over the years. Flies were not tolerated by the housewife. Splat! Take That. Of course, the fly dashed away at the last minute.
War was declared. Troops were allowed to use any tool available to send the annoying fly to his doom. Hammers and wood blocks were used freely. There were times when the Three Stooges looked normal as battle was made against the humble house fly. Even The Star-Herald found itself making a sacrifice. Rolled into a stick, gripped on the end like a club, the paper became a fly swatter. Hunting skills were practiced. One waited, careful not to move a muscle.
When the dangerous fly landed on your sister’s head…Smack! The wily fly escaped to the shrill cries of an offended sis. Hundreds of warrants in the Sheriff’s Office were served of flies and yet Justice was powerless.
A simple tailor from the Magic Kingdom once got seven at one time. He embroidered that fact on a belt and soon was thrust to fame for giant killing. The flies remain. In daylight you can hear them laughing, and come night, one sleeps. It is very hard to see a fly, black, in the dark of the night. It’s time there was a contest pitting fly against man. Can you invent a better flyswatter?
In nooks and crannies the September flies grow and multiply, laughing all the time. Fire hoses can not drown the pesky fly.
As another round of fly swatting begins, take care, hold your breath, wait for the fly to land on the head of your boss… then Strike! Fast, quick, and with force. If you can kill that pesky fly that promotion is coming your way. Don’t miss it.
Orpheus Allison is a photojournalist living in The County who graduated from UMPI and earned a master of liberal arts degree from the University of North Carolina. He began his journalism career at WAGM television later working in many different areas of the US. After 20 years of television he changed careers and taught in China and Korea.
