This seemed like a typical weekend when I was working in Fort Fairfield on a Saturday and I always tried to get to Mass at Sacred Heart Church in North Caribou at 5:30. Getting out of work at 5 meant a little bit of a direct drive scurry to get there just as the priest might be walking down the aisle. My wife, Charlene, was always there waiting for me and I would just slide in the pew beside her.
It seems sometimes that when we might be hurrying ourselves a little it takes a few minutes to unwind contingent on the type of day we are having. Today was such a day but I was grateful to be at church where I can usually bring my week into focus.
The Mass was proceeding on its normal schedule of readings when I decided to close my eyes on the first reading to increase my concentration. This may have been a mistake for my concentration seemed to get lost in all that had taken place that day and mixed in with this were things that needed to be done at the house; I seemed to be in the midst of a mental no man’s land being anywhere but at church. I must confess, the first reading went right over my head wherever my head was and I then felt it was time to open my eyes and get with the program so to speak.
I was focused on the next reading and the Gospel and strangely a verse that turned out to be in the first reading that I had missed seemed to be stuck in my subconscious. The verse was short “and every kind of perception to discern what is of value”. What did this mean and where did it come from?
I went to the full text of the first reading and it was from Philippians chapter 1 verse 9 to 11. St. Paul is speaking “And this is my prayer, that your love may increase ever more and more in knowledge and every kind of perception, to discern what is of value, so that you may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ for the glory and praise of God.”
What seemed to amaze me more than anything is my inner excitement when I read this verse. I believe now that the Holy Spirit was giving me something very special and my spirit was very stirred up to receive this. I read it over and over and I was so excited that I turned to Charlene and pointing to the verse, I may have spoke out too loud and with a wide look in my eye and said, “I have found it, this is what I have been looking for, this explains everything to me!” Charlene looked a little confused and gave me that look as though I might have finally “lost it.”
Why was the Holy Spirit bringing this to my attention if it didn’t have a special significance? I personally believe all Scripture is very important but maybe at certain times God wants to use certain verses for us individually to help our understanding and spiritual growth.
I just knew in my spirit that this verse would be special to me yet I wasn’t sure what I was to do with it. I read it many times and then I was led to memorize it. I happened to be traveling the following week and I found myself eating at restaurants as we all do when traveling. The napkins at each and every restaurant served me well in writing it down to memorize and I did this a lot, trying to get this verse into my head and hopefully it would drop into my heart. I always left the verse on the napkin for the next person who might take my seat as a means of evangelizing.
After I had it thoroughly memorized, then the true gift and meaning of the verse started to show itself in my heart. The words, “may your love increase ever more and more” now meant to me God’s love for each one of us. I couldn’t look at people without realizing how much God loved everyone. Now all people became my brothers and sisters and God is our mutual loving Father. The words of the verse “every kind of perception, to discern what is of value” explained to me why I realized one time in a grocery store that it was God’s love for all mankind that He created all our food and produce in foreknowledge of all our needs. Everything I picked up in the store seemed to say to my spirit that I was holding God’s love.
As this scripture entered more and more into my heart, I saw people more compassionately and became more understanding than I had been before. I saw the struggles that many people go through, and the commonality we all have in our heartaches and disappointments. I came to realize we were all put on this earth to find God’s will in our lives and God’s path for each one of us is different.
I also became less judgmental with people in general and more patient even with myself with my many faults. It is in the struggles and trials that God wants to carry us and all we have to do is pray and ask for His help. I came to realize God loves us just as we are, that we can’t earn God’s love and His love for us is to be given back to our fellow man.
The last part of the verse, “filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ” became more clear to me. This now spoke to my heart that if I was to be filled with the fruit of righteousness I couldn’t rely on myself but it is through God and my trust and dependence on Him that I can bear this good fruit. It is through the leading of the Holy Spirit and our openness and response to His leading that we can do the will of God that can make us pure and blameless on the day of Christ.
I now realize God wants to give us everything of value and the gold nugget of life is in each one of us, there for our discovery.
Peter Pinette is a resident of Woodland.
